Sleepless (oneshot)
by ReaderWriterfella
Summary: While hanging out with his good friend Kirishima and Kaminari on a hunting trip. Izuku finds himself and in a rather odd situation when two woman show up with kids.


**"I AM HERE IN A FANFICTION!!!!" **Roars All Might scaring the living hell out of Izuku.

Izuku blinks coming to the realisation that he's just standing in a blank white space with his all time favourite hero. "All Might? Where are we? What's going on." He asked in clear confusion.

**"Ah Young Midoriya! We're currently in a place of non existence. A place where time and space don't exist except us and all our actions and thinking is controlled by a superior being!"** Explained All Might further confusing the boy

_"I think calling me a superior being is a little over top. I'm just a bogan that's got nothing better to do then to make you guys tell one of my stories." _Explained Readerwriterfella.

Izuku blinked in confusion starting to get himself a headache from the extremely strange scenario he finds himself in. "So what exactly do mean by telling one of your stories? You're not gonna make me hook up with Kacchan or something along those lines are you."

"Oh Jesus No! You two are rivals aiming for the top. Not lovers." Spoke Readerwriterfella

All Might then decided to speak up **"Sorry to interrupt but can you explain your intentions for this story Young man. By the way I think you're going a little over top with this fourth wall break thing."**

"In my opinion if you're gonna break the fourth wall you should go all out absolutely smash the fucking cunt. Like how guys do it with the Plus Ultra thing." Explained Readerwriterfella shocking the old symbol of peace and the innocent cinnamon roll with his casual use of foul language.

"Anyway I'm getting sidetracked. Basically my man Izuku here is gonna be part of a retelling of a story that happened to me a couple of years ago. It's a good pub yarn so I've decided to tell the tale using characters from your universe." Further explained Readerwriterfella

Izuku rubbed the back of his neck in thought "So who exactly am I going to be?"

"Oh you're gonna be me. And believe me when I say this is a true story."

**"Why have you picked young Midoriya to be you. You're more of a Kirishima/Fatgum love child looking gentleman if I'm gonna be honest with your appearance." **

Readerwriterfella crossed his arms eyeing off the old pro _"Okay first of all... Fuck you. How dare degrade those two comparing them to me. And second of all is that during the events that take place in this story of mine. I'm pretty certain Deku and I behaved and reacted in the same way."_

"Okay so where do we start? How do we start?" Questioned the green haired boy.

"I'll just dump you in the middle of the Victorian high country. Since that's where this tale takes place." Smirked Readerwriterfella and clicked his fingers. _"This conversation never happened."_

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**Story Begins**

Izuku stood up and cracked his back in satisfaction as he finished packing the meat from a deer he just harvested into his backpack. He took a swig from his water bottle enjoying the sight of the setting sun across the tall hills of the Victorian high country. 

He smiled softly managing to catch a glimpse of the snow capped tops of the snowy mountains far off into the distance. As the sun continued to drop over the horizon so did the temperature. He quickly slipped on his favourite camouflaged jumper and strapped on his pack feeling pride that it's now heavier then it was at the start of the day. He then picked up his rifle letting it ride on his shoulder as he checked his phone to check the map on where he needs to go to get back to the farmhouse.

This was Izukus first time in this area so he had no familiarity to it. All he had was the map on his phone and the pieces of advice he got from his friend Kirishima who had invited him down to look for the deer species known as Sambar. They were a big bodied and difficult deer to find.

The deer Izuku currently had in his pack was a species known as a Fallow which were common in most parts of eastern Australia.

Izuku had spent the afternoon alone in the bush since kirishima and his friend Kaminari had an AFL game to play in.

As darkness began to fall and consume the land. Izuku had made it into a dirt road that lead to the farmhouse. The house itself remained dark signalling that no one had returned home yet. But as Izuku closed the distance two cars arrived at a few people seem to be gathered around.

As he approached he found Kirishima outside taking off his football shoes. Seeing Izuku in the corner of his eye he looked up to greet him. "Hey Midoriya! How'd you go out over the back?"

Izuku simply pulled off his back and showed Kirishima that it's full of fresh venison "I'll be kept feed for a while anyway." Answered Izuku

"Nice man!"

Izuku then noticed two attractive woman moving around the house along with a pair of children. He glanced at Kirishima confused "friends of yours?"

"Kaminaris actually. The blonde one is a girl he's 'seeing' and the dark haired one is her older sister with the two kids." Explained Kirishima.

Izuku decided not to question anymore and decided to take care of the meat before it had a chance to go sour and go to complete waste.

Once satisfied that the venison was safe Izuku changed out of his hunting gear and into something more casual like jeans and a black T-shirt that ironically said shirt on it.

As he walked out into the living room he noticed Kaminari talking with the blonde girl. While Kirishima seemed to be caught up chatting with Dark haired woman.

It was then he felt a tug and he looked down to be meet with a pair of ruby coloured eyes. The little girl looked up at him with complete and utter innocence. Then she held up Kaminaris cat towards him "I found him." She spoke

Izuku blinked "oh... uh okay. Good job?"

"Eri put the cat down." Called out the dark haired woman before returning to her conversation with Kirishima.

The girl named Eri did as she was told then sat down infront of the tv with her little brother to watch tv. Izuku shrugged and sat on the couch watching whatever cartoon they had on.

At some point during the evening Kirishima and the dark haired woman left to get pizza for everyone and returned shortly afterwards.

As the five adults sat together eating pizza and drinking (Kirishima and Izuku drank orange juice since they don't like alchole while the others drank beer and Vodka.) Izuku learned the names of the women.

The blonde was named Yu. And her older sister was named Nemuri with her two young children being Eri and Kota.

As Izuku chewed on his slice of meatlovers pizza he casually listened to the other four talk. He would join in on the conversation but he always felt some what intimidated by attractive woman. He was terrible at talking to regular people in general let alone women he'd consider way out of his league.

To top it off it was a conversation on a subject he knew nothing about. Relationships.

He'd never been in one so he couldn't exactly add his ten cents to the conversation. In the end he gave up and left the four to go watch tv.

Few minutes past when Kirishima joined him on the couch with the two kids watching one of the planet of the ape films. Somehow without Izukus realisation he had been put on babysitting duty while the children's mother was busy taking in interest in Izukus friend.

Kirishima dipped in his juice while Izuku continued to watch the film in comfortable silence. Then the view of the tv was quickly blocked by Yu who was standing shirtless in a black lace bra posing with her hands in her hair. "What do you boys think I need to go to the gym? I think I'm getting fat."

izuku tensed up staring at the woman's perfectly tanned body and toned stomach while also glancing at her chest. During that time he began to resemble a ripe tomato as he stuttered out an answer "i... I Uh well Um think you're fine as you are."

"Awww thank you hehe." She giggled before strutting out of the room.

Izuku shook his head trying to process what happened until Nemuri stepped into view wearing only a white lace bra and panties and bending over wearing a seductive smirk on her face. "I was thinking about becoming a swimsuit model. You think I can do it?"

Izukus eyes widened as he looked at the woman before him admiring every part of her figure. At this point he looked like a piece of molten with a tuffed of grass ontop with how badly he was flustered. "Uh Uh Uh um uhhhh um y-yeah... I-I think you'd m-make a g-great model."

"Well aren't you sweet." She whispered before walking out of the room with a sway in her hips.

Izuku slowly turned to look at Kirishima who was also flustered by what they saw. "What just happened?"

"I... I don't know." Was Kirishimas answer as he was still processing what occurred.

Night dragged on and eventually Izuku was covering Kota and Eri in a blanket while they slept on the couch by the fire place. Tiredness began to consume him and he decided to call it a night walking off into the room he was staying in.

He crawled into bed shiver as the room was unspeakably cold. Even though he had 3 blankets, 2 sleeping bags and 4 sheets to give him warmth. He was still curled up into a ball trying to get warm because as he currently was it was far to cold to sleep.

Especially with the clattering of his own teeth keeping him awake. He probably laid there for half an hour before enough warmth came to the bed that he began to feel the power of sleep consume him. He sighed relaxing finally being able to get to sleep. He had a big drive to the outback for work the following day so rest was very much needed.

But then.

"Ahh ahhh ahhh fuck ahhh fuck mmmm yes yes Fuck! OH FUCK YES YES AHHH AHHHHHH OH MY FUCKING GOD!"

Izukus eyes shot straight open hearing a woman clearly having a really good time. "You have got to be kidding me." He mumbled.

He was so close. Just one more second and he would've been asleep peacefully. But no. Things couldn't be easy for him. Because when things start to appear fine the cruel unshaven bastard named reality always lurks around the corner to kick you down.

As the moans continued Izuku sighed waiting patiently for it to end. There was no way of getting to sleep with such a distraction. He couldn't even get aroused by it since it was so fucking cold he's dick wouldn't even consider coming out to say hello you tricked it into thinking you were in a strip club on the Gold Coast.

He sighed again thinking out loud "Like how are they not worried about waking the kids."

Eventually the house became quiet again. Izuku groaned and stood up deciding he need a glass of water. When we stepped out into the kitchen he was meet with Kirishima and Nemuri both with a glass of juice.

Nemuri drank her juice casually while Kirishima looked at Izuku like a kangaroo caught in the head lights "Hey buddy... sleeping good?"

"Uh ummm well I'm actually kind of having trouble getting to sleep." Replied Izuku sheepishly.

Nemuri raised a brow and casually left the kitchen heading back to the main bedroom. Kirishima quickly grabs Izuku and drags him into the room Izuku was staying "Bro what did you hear?!"

"Uh well I think a better question would be what didn't I hear." Spoke Izuku quietly 

Kirishima began to blush with a embarrassed smile "sorry man. It all just kind of happened."

"Hey it's okay. Good for you. I just wished you two were a little more quiet is all." Chuckled Izuku trying to lighten the mood.

Kirishima gave him a look "two?"

Izuku nodded "y-yeah. You and Nemuri."

Kirishimas eyes widened "Oh... you didn't know."

Izuku furrowed his brows in raw confusion "huh?"

Kirishima closed the door and spoke quietly "it started off with Nemuri and me. But half way through Yu walks in and switches with her. So now Yu rode me while Nemuri went off and finished off Kaminari."

Izukus eyes widened hearing the truth. "You... you guys had a foursome?!"

Kirishima chuckled rubbing the back of his head "Yeah I guess so. But wait... does it count as a foursome because Kaminari and I didn't do anything to each other so would it be considered a form of threesome?"

Izuku shrugged "I go no idea. I know nothing about this stuff. I just thought you got lucky. I didn't expect both you and Kaminari to be part of a poorly written real life Porn scenario."

"Neither did we. Hell I didn't even know they were staying here." Added Kirishima 

"Well could at least be kind enough to keep quiet enough to let me sleep. I got a 13 hour drive tomorrow." Yawned Izuku as tiredness began to consume him once again.

Kirishima nodded "yeah I think we're done for the night so should be all good." 

They were not done for the night.

**6 hours Later**

Izuku sat infront of the fireplace in the living room with a total of 1 and half hours sleep under his belt. The combination of the endless moaning and the unbearable cold just wouldn't allow the boy adequate sleep.

He had hoped the warmth of the fire would help him and it almost did til Eri woke up with pure intent on watching tv. Izuku sighed and put on a kids show and watched it boredly wondering how kids can be so easily entertained by such poorly written crap and second handed rejected looking muppets.

Eventually the others woke and began behaving like they never had a fuckfest at all. Atleast that's how Kaminari and Yu acted. Kirishima and Nemuri hadn't come out of the room yet.

For some reason everyone was gathered around that room but Izuku didn't pay my attention assuming they were just talking. But then shy innocent Eri approached him "I want my mum."

Izuku looked down at her before gently picking her up holding her "Okay. Let's go to mummy then." He carried the small girl over towards the others and gently pushed through into the room.

As he stepped in he looked up to see Nemuri wearing only a grey T-shirt and nothing with her bottom half completely exposed. Izuku glanced down for a moment as his eyes slowly widened and locked into Nemuris.

Then the two began to have a race on who was becoming flustered the fastest. Nemuri quickly grabbed a blanket to cover up while Izuku dropped Eri on the bed and turned around and bolted out the door "THERESYOURMOMBYE!!!"

More time past as Izuku hid in his designated bedroom for his stay to afraid and embarrassed to speak to the others. Especially Nemuri. Eventually he gained the courage to walk out but mainly for the reason that he thought it was best for him to back up his gear and start the long drive north and west to the outback.

As he walked out he found Kirishima and Kaminari sitting outside looking completely drained of energy. As he approached the two they both continued stared numbly forward. "You two okay?" Asked Izuku

Kirishima looked up at him "This doesn't happen... what happened last night just doesn't happen."

"He's right. We don't come out here and do wild shit like that. This is the first time something like this has ever happened to us." Added Kaminari 

"Believe me when I say Izuku that we did not plan this to happen. I was planning to go find a Sambar stag with you. Not all that." Said a very tired and drained Kirishima 

Izuku chuckled in understanding as he searched around in his esky and tossed a bottle of Powerade to the two boys "Here. After last night I think you guys need to get some electrolytes back in your system."

The two took the drinks gratefully with a chuckle and helped Izuku pack his gear away along with the meat.

**2 weeks Later**

"WHY THE HELL DIDNT YOU JOIN IN! That's was a golden opportunity for you Midoriya!"

Izuku wondered a lot of things during his life. Like how come Joe Rogan hasn't done a podcast with All Might. Or why Ms Joke hasn't done a Netflix Special. Another one would be how come I eat stuff with tomato sauce but hate tomatoes.

But at the moment he was wondering how the hell was he friends with a sex pest pervert like Mineta. And why was he dumb enough to tell him about his last hunting trip with Kirishima.

"You had two perfectly good babes giving it the all and even switching partners yet you didn't have the balls to wipe it out and join in. I've never been more disappointed in you Midoriya." Said Mineta in complete disbelief.

Izuku rolled his eyes not really caring what the little twerp thought. Even if Izuku wanted to join in. How was he meant to. He was sure there was like a code or something to follow.

But honestly he'd rather keep his distance and respect women rather then just assume something then have it turned against him making him a terrible perv.

Mineta maybe willing to take that risk but he wasn't. The conversation was interrupted when Kacchan stepped in. "Even if Deku wanted in he wouldn't know what he fucking doing. Hasn't even kissed a girl. And you expect him to walk in and join an Orgy on his first go?"

"It'll be a good way to break into the game." Retorted Mineta.

Izuku groaned hiding his face within his hands as Mineta and Kacchan argued over something that means absolutely nothing to either of them and achieves absolutely fuck all.

The story of that night would be retold many times. Because in the end Izuku thought it was pretty funny looking back on it. So when Izuku joins Kirishima by a camp fire with their other friends up in the mountains the story will be brought up and all around the camp fire would laugh as the story was told from both Izukus and Kirishimas point of you.

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_"Hmmmm I feel like it's not as funny to read as it is when I tell it to the guys." _Thought Readerwriterfella.

_"I might just delete it in and work on my Ochako fic or my Deku Turtle idea."_

"After all that! You're just gonna delete it?" Yelled Izuku 

_"Well yeah. It's like stand up. The jokes work better spoken out loud with good timing in delivery. So this story works better told then read in my opinion."_

"So what!? I stopped being a hero in training just for this story."

**"This is just another unnecessary Fourth wall break. Couldn't you just simplify how you felt about the story as an Author Note?"**

_"I'm the one doing the writing Toshinori! Not you! But yes you are correct. This is an unnecessary wall break and properly without a doubt confusing the shit out of the reader since I've basically gone insane and having three conversation with myself.."_

Izuku and All Might share look of concern before clearing they're throats. "Well I hope they somewhat enjoyed the story anyway."

_"Not likely. Ninth Inheritor Uraraka shits all over this one shot."_

All Might shrugs and turns to the reader **"Anyways PLUS ULTRA!!!!"**


End file.
